This is a continuation of an earlier poem, now with “new and improved” kvetching:

Email etiquette is out the window
Especially when subject to Outlook limbo

Reply-all should be illegal
Even abolitionists agree, it is fecal

However, if I deign to reply to a Distribution List
That email, my inbox, I expect it should miss

Why should my own response be marked as unread???
It makes me want to return to bed

Now, I turn my attention to calendar
The results are nothing short of terrible

Declined invites are move to the trash
even if my schedule changes, and I can make the bash

That’s how I ended up alone with my coffee
Meanwhile, in the conference room, sat my entire posse

However, cancelled appointments stay day after day
Holding time hostage while my confidence decays

Speaking of pain points when it comes to agendas
I’m responsible for invites, like a true yenta

But after I invite 25 people individually,
The last thing I need is 25 responses residually

This gripe is only amplified
When one or more people are currently beachside

Out of office emails, there must be a better way
To indicate that you’ll get back to me in a day

Or two or three, I really don’t mind
Except when my inbox explodes – then I’m in a bind

Then there’s the problem of filing my threads
I usually click one at a time and wait for amends

Google is instant, Yahoo is too
MS Outlook – WHY AM I STUCK WITH YOU

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